Video Distribution as Restaurants

I had this idea the other day. It’s not a perfect analogy, but I don’t think there is such a thing. If you have any suggestions for improvements or additions, leave them in the comments.

Broadcast cable or dish:
For a hefty monthly fee you have full access to all food currently being served. You can eat as much or as little as you like, but some dishes will be served at specific times so don’t be late. You meal will be interrupted every 7 or so minutes by a salesman who has paid for the pleasure to talk to you. His short pitches are potential entertaining, but repetitive. You have a few options for how much food you would like access to, but all your meals must be eaten at home.

Netflix:
For a moderate fee you have access to a large buffet of food and you may eat as much or little as you like. If you put down a meal you can pick it up at a later date without much trouble. You may choose any dish they offer to eat at any time. Certain menu items can only be delivered as take out and for a small fee will be delivered to your door within one or two business days. You may eat the meals anywhere you have access to the service.

RedBox:
Stop buy for a quick and cheap meal whenever you like. Menu is limited, but the prices are low. Meals must be eaten within 24 hours or a second fee will be charged.

Hulu:
Stop buy and get a free meal anytime you like. Menu selection is limited and you must have appropriate access to eat. Your meal will be interrupted several times by salesman who have paid to talk with you, many of whom represent global charities showing you dying children and asking for money. For a moderate fee, you can gain access to a larger menu, including popular dishes that chefs made over past weeks, but your meal will still be interrupted by salesman. You are allowed to eat most meals anywhere you have access, but not all meals are available on all platforms. There is, however, a large selection of appetizers, which are usually followed or preceded by sale pitches. Occasionally when ordering a meal you will be directed to a different restaurant where the meal is originally from and told you may order it there.

Hypothesis on Water Levels

In theory, it is possible the increase in ocean levels can be attributed to, at least in part, the growing number of seafaring vessels in the water today, accounting for many of the crashed planes, sunk ships, and every growing sea creatures.

If anyone is interested in funding a study, drop me a line.

Krikkiters and the 5 Star Rating System

It’ll have to go.

Netflix does an amazing job of categorizing and filtering movies in an effort to suggest movies you might like and hide movies you probably are not interested in. The metrics it uses are quite interesting, typically breaking things down by genre and categories over the course of several pages where you can set your “taste preferences”.

This is all fine and wonderful, but Netflix also employs a rating system for viewers to rate movies. It’s a 5 star rating system where 1 star means “I hated it,” 2 – “I didn’t like it,” 3 – “I liked it,” 4 – “I really liked it,” and 5 – “I loved it.”

This results in me giving almost all movies 3 stars, except for the occasional few that strike me and get a 4 star rating with the coveted 5 star rating reserved for movies by Edgar Wright and Peter Jackson.

More often then not, I find this rating system to be relatively unhelpful. Since most my movies are rated 3 stars Netflix has a hard time finding movies for me that it thinks I will rate more than 4 stars. To be fair, they are mostly accurate with their guesses, but whenever I say “I liked it” I usually like to follow with a “but this was wrong” clause. Very rarely do I like everything in a movie. But if I liked the acting but not the plot, how does it rate? If I loved the concept but nothing else, how many stars is that? What if I thought the book was better?

I think it would be more helpful if Netflix offered more rating options after viewing a movie. For example:

“I like the concept, but horribly executed.”

“Really bad dialogue. But otherwise passable.”

“Failed to hold my attention.”

“Special effects look like the work of a teenage dog. Acting was surprisingly good.”

“I cannot believe someone got paid to make this.”

Now, arguably, this is where the user reviews come in, you can write whatever you want about the movie. But free text data tends to be very hard to parse. Especially when compared to other possible rating systems.

What if Netflix gave “advanced users” an options for “advanced ratings” for movies. Rather than rating the movie as a whole an enthusiastic movie reviewer would have the option to rate the movie on several characteristics. For example: Plot, Acting, Concept, Storytelling, Suspension of Disbelief, Writing, Action, Humor, Production Quality, etc.

It might even be possible to allow the user to choose a standard subset of criteria from a vast selection of possible theatrical aspects. Maybe the user could even rate the individual actors performances for each movie.

Would anyone actually use this? I think if only a small percentage of Netflix users began using more advanced ratings there would be potential for a large wealth of data, data from consumers.

No really, would anyone use this? Probably not. But I still think a 5 point rating system for movies is a silly concept.

What I would really like to see from Netflix, more than anything, is an IMDB style actor network database. Or perhaps, a means to integrate the two sites.

Whenever I find a movie, I grab my iPad or iPod or Cell Phone or Laptop or Desktop computer and go to IMDB. Pretty much immediately. (Occasionally I use a close friend, but it’s a lot harder to follow an audible stream of names you don’t recognize.) As I peruse IMDB I usually find myself looking at movies and thinking “I wonder if those are on Netflix…” I then need to go to Netflix and search the movie out. And if I’m on my iPad I can’t add DVDs to my queue, only instant streaming movies. But if IMDB had a button which read “Add to Netflix queue if available” I could easily add all kinds of movies without having to hunt and search them out.

Basically, I want IMDB ease of hunting and cross referencing with the ease of streaming Netflix provides.

Would anyone actually use this? Oh yeah.

Filenames

Filenames are like passwords. They cause a user to panic and usually, make a mistake.

Some applications are better than others. Take Microsoft Word for example, or perhaps some other word document application. A user opens up a blank page and begins typing. Once they are done typing they click save and then need to name the file. By the point a user is usually ready to save, they have a good idea of what the document is going to be called. The name comes easily.

Compare that to Garage Band by Apple. A user opens up Garage Band and is immediately asked to name the file for the song they are going to create. A typical user just wants to play around, or maybe start work on a project. They don’t want to name the song, they just want to start playing. (At least, that’s how I feel when I open Garage Band.) Thus, the user panics and chooses something like “Test Play Something Whatever” rather than something more substantial.

Move on to a higher level of application and things get much worse. Final Cut Pro is like Word, you can open a project and start working with video before you need to save your project. This is nice, since you can get a feel for what project you are working on before you name it. It only becomes a problem when you try to export your file.

In most academic situations that I have experienced, students will be exporting multiple versions of their project. The first version will be a draft to show to their students. They will typically name the file “Something Project”. Professors and other students will suggest improvements and the student will update the file, and export it again with the name “Something Project Final”. This will not be the final, though, because they will find something else they want to improve or something else that went wrong. It will be exported again as “Something Project Final Final” and then again as “FINAL PROJECT I MEAN IT THIS TIME” which gives no indication about what project it is for, or who made it.

File naming policies can be as important as personal password policies. If you decide ahead of time that all your files (or exports) will follow the same pattern (LastNameFirstInitial – Project Name – Version Number) then you will not be worried when it comes time to save your file. You’ll save everything correctly and be able to find the latest version of your video every time.

The same goes for passwords. When most users encounter as password box they panic and choose a password they used somewhere else. Or maybe they choose the first thing that comes to mind. If they had a pre defined algorithm for choosing a password they would be much better off.

Unfortunately, most people don’t do this on their own and need to be taught or guided on the correct path. All it takes is a few temporary files that need to be saved and the habit can quickly fall to the wayside.

In the future, applications will function like Apple’s iOS, and every app will save their own files to a special place and the user won’t need to worry about where they are saved. They might not even need to worry about file names. But until then make your life easier. So do yourself a favor, and come up with a few naming policies. Then you don’t have to panic when the scary save box shows up.

File Systems and Normal Users

What is a file system?
In simple computer terms we can consider the file system to be a hierarchal listing of the contents of a computer. For example, you might consider how your computer has specific folder for you documents, photos, movies, etc. It’s an organizational system.

The problem is that people don’t understand file systems. This is a very interesting problem, because we use them all the time in our day to day lives.

File systems in life are vastly more abstract, practically to the point of transparency. For example: the package is in my car. Or the key is in the top drawer or my desk, in my office, down the hall. We use this system to file away locations of objects all the time. It’s perfectly natural.

It only makes sense that we would use this natural mapping in the world of computer files as well right? Well, no.

In the world of software, a folder is a folder is a folder is a folder. What differentiates one folder from another? The name? Occasionally the color or the icon? That’s not enough.

When a user goes to save a file they are presented with a box of choices. They often have to navigate a series of identical folders to find the correct location to save a file. Sometimes the computer tries to help by guessing the correct location. Sometimes, such as in Mac OS, the folder structure is hidden from view.

Mac OS X save box, hides the folder structure.

Here the folders can be seen and selected.

I can’t tell you how many times a student (a younger students, supposedly of this tech-y generation) will save a file and immediately have no idea where to go to find the file.

Now, applications are getting smarter and often have options to view the most recent documents, but this does not solve the problem. In fact, one might argue that it makes things worse, since it can be so heavily relied upon.

Sometimes it’s not really a problem, when a Word document is saved, it’s saved somewhere to the drive, probably in the documents folder. You know what you are saving and you know the general location of where it is.

Other applications are less clear. We have a sound capturing application which saves a folder rather than a file. This way all the sound files are saved as separate .wav files in one location. But this is not clear to the user who casually wants to use the program. If and when the user saves the recording document, they are not saving the sound itself, but a file which contains a reference to all the sounds. If they copy this file to a different computer, they don’t have access to any of the sounds.

Some applications, such as Final Cut Pro, are even more confusing. Final Cut requires that a “scratch disk” be set. This is a location where Final Cut can store the video files and other things that it might need. This concept is not a normal for computer users and teaching it provides a certain level of difficulty. If a user doesn’t understand what a “scratch disk” does, they will be less likely to remember it or think that it is important. Even an experienced user can forget to correctly set the scratch disk and will soon find that they have lost some very valuable files.

Of course, this becomes even more complex when moving into a system where multiple computers are being accessed and files are saved to a central server. To computer geeks like myself, it’s perfectly obvious that a server connection should be listed under “Volumes” at the root level of the Mac OS. The geeks know why there are two folders with different icons. (No one knows why Apple hasn’t fixed the sidebar so that it shows connected servers and doesn’t say “connection failed” every time you try to click on it.)

What does life look like without file systems?
The iPad (and Apple’s iOS) is a perfect example of providing a transparent (more life-like) file system.

Typing apps, such as Notes give you a list of all your documents, and allow you to send notes as emails. Documents are automatically saved when you close the app. The user doesn’t have to think at all.

Photos from the camera are saved to the “Camera Roll” there is no other option. From the viewing gallery you can email the photo, print it or copy it to use somewhere else. Other image applications can access those images and save their images to it as well.

If you are searching for something the search is “look for the app” rather than “hunt for the file.”

For what it’s worth, Apple’s iPhoto, iTunes, and iMovie operate in a similar fashion, although they sometimes require the user to set up an initial “Library” where these things are kept.

Web apps and websites work the same way. On Facebook I know to go to “Photos” or “Videos” to find what I am looking for. It’s still a file structure, but it’s more visual and it feels more like “real life”. It feels more location based rather than folder based, go to flickr for photos, go to YouTube for videos.

I think this is where the future is headed, or at very least, should be headed. We need a system where the all the file management is handled by the application, rather than the use.

Difficulties
That said, there are many difficulties associated with this system.

The iPhoto database can be fragile. I have more than once been in a situation where the iPhoto library is corrupted, or the hard drive it resides on is unreadable. In these instances, photos can still be accessed inside the library, but changes and modifications are not saved.

If files are stored in a “secret” location, how can they be backed up? Can it be saved to a flash drive for transfer or for sharing? Can I access the file from different devices?

What if I need to use several apps to complete my work flow? Can each app see the file I need it to see?

As more cloud syncing services (such as DropBox) become available, I think some of these issues will solve themselves.

Overall, the file system will never go away. There are certain features and options we will always need to have access to. In the end, though, it’s something that normal users shouldn’t have to think about. And honestly, it’s something I wish I didn’t really have to think about.

Do you think we’ll ever see file systems become completely transparent? How would you solve these problems?

Dear Post Office,

I’m sorry I had the wrong address, my information was obviously outdated. And I thank you for giving me the correct address, yet I can’t fathom why you would send me the correct address on the front of letter I was trying to send.

I mean, I’m trying to get a letter to someone and you not only know who, but also the correct address to reach them.

All I’m saying is that I don’t understand how this benefits anyone. It doesn’t help me because I have to find another stamp, possibly another envelope and mail this letter out again. It doesn’t help you because you have to handle it again to send it back to me and then a third time to send it to the original recipient.

Now, I get the fact that you don’t want everyone sending out misaddressed letters. I can tell from this label that you have a “window” of time where you will forward the letter without problem. I just think there has to be a better way to handle these things.

For example, maybe after the “free forwarding window” has ended you can simply continue to forward the mail (provided you know the correct address) and then send a humiliating postcard back to the original sender. It can say something like “you are a bad person” or “you don’t know much about so-and-so, do you?” or “have you talked to so-and-so lately? They’ve moved.”

Perhaps you can augment this strong language with an obnoxious picture or perhaps a small bill which contains a small forwarding fee that needs to be paid. Maybe you can flag our mailboxes with a “this person sends bad letters” flag after a few bad letters have been sent.

You know where we live, it’s not like we are hiding from you guys.

What it really comes down to is that we live in the 21st century. The whole aspect of sending a physical letter is actually rather inconvenient for someone who does most of their work online. Having to resend a letter only makes the whole process more inconvenient and makes me think that it really isn’t worth the trouble.

Despite the wealth of personal information we put online today, very few of my friends and family actually list their mailing address on Facebook or other social networks. The Post Office, however, has a list of EVERYONE’s address. If there was only some way to tap into that.

Now, I realize I could simply ask all my friends and family for their addresses, but this entails a lot of work. (I’m sure you know all about keeping track of addresses.) Many of my friends are moving throughout the year. Others I don’t see or don’t respond to my inquiries. (Yes, I have considered this to be an indication that they don’t want me sending them mail.) Also, it ruins any surprise that they will be getting a letter from me.

My solutions as listed here might not be perfect, and in some instances it might actually be a bad idea. All I ask though, is that you take a careful look at what you are actually doing and find some ways to make the user experience better. The last thing you need to do right now is force more people away to using electronic or alternative means to deliver their messages.

Thank you for your time, and your help in the past to deliver messages.

Hope you can figure something out.

-Philip

Game Theory

I recently saw “The Good, The Bad, & The Weird”, (side note, I’d rate the movie 1/5 stars, it didn’t hold my interest), but at the end of the movie there is a three way duel. I was intrigued by the strategy that would take place in a three way duel, provided the right groundwork is set up. (The duel in the movie is not really that spectacular.)

The Rules:
Duelist A has a rifle, duelist B has two pistols, and duelist C has a single handgun (gun type doesn’t really matter). Assume that all the players shoot to kill and have perfect aim, except player B who cannot aim in two directions at once. For the sake of easy math, let’s say that if player B points a gun at each opponent but only looks in one direction he will kill the person he looks at and has a 30% chance of killing the other player. (I postulate this 30% chance as an option, but I will not take it any further in my analysis. The added complexity might change the strategy, but I do not feel it’s worth exploring for me at this time.) If player B aims at both opponents with peripheral vision, he has a 50% chance of hitting both opponents. Assume also that all the players are capable of shooting at least once in the duel and I see no reason for a limitation on ammo, as they have perfect aim. The person who does not get shot wins the game. It’s possible for the game to have no winners, in fact, it seems likely.

The Theory:
Since player B has two weapons, it makes sense that he would point a gun at both opponents in the best scenario he would kill both. This means that each opponent has a 50% chance of being killed. Players A and C then have quite a bit of incentive to both fire at player B. But since both A and C have 100% chance of killing player B, one of the bullets would be wasted and they would kill each other with the second shot (provided they survived the shots from B). With a 50% chance of surviving a shot from B it would be more beneficial to kill off the person with a 100% chance of killing you, so A and C should really shoot at each other. If they shoot at each other, no one shoots at B and B would survive.

The Hypothesis:
My original assumption in creating this scenario was that it would be more beneficial for a player with one gun to shoot at the other player with one gun than to shoot at the player with two guns, which seems like the first logical choice. This strategy is only beneficial, however, when one of the one gun players fires at the two gun player.

As I continue to think this over it looks like a game where there can really be no winner, except maybe B. But what if each character had 90% accuracy rather than 100%. In stating this I realize that perhaps a limitation on ammo could be necessary, at which time I might suggest moving to a 2 shot per person system where multiple winners would be accepted. It would depend on how the numbers work out.

The Math:
Originally I planned on writing up the theory of strategy that one could use in this situation, but as I put my thoughts onto paper I realized that a simulation would be really helpful in finding out what strategy actually worked for this. So I decided to do some math.

For experiment one I assumed that player A would always shoot player C and that player C would shoot randomly at the other players. Using a coin I flipped for C, heads meant he shot at A, tails was a shot at B. I then flipped the coin for B twice, once for a shot at each opponent, where heads was a hit and tails was a miss. I did this ten times, my results were unsatisfactory.

1: A shoots @C; B misses A, B misses C; C shoots @A; B wins;
2: A shoots @C; B misses A, B misses C; C shoots @A; B wins;
3: A shoots @C; B hits A, B hits C; C shoots @A; B wins;
4: A shoots @C; B hits A, B misses C; C shoots @A; B wins;
5: A shoots @C; B hits A, B misses C; C shoots @A; B wins;
6: A shoots @C; B misses A, B misses C; C shoots @B; A wins;
7: A shoots @C; B hits A, B misses C; C shoots @A; B wins;
8: A shoots @C; B misses A, B hits C; C shoots @A; B wins;
9: A shoots @C; B misses A, B misses C; C shoots @A; B wins;
10: A shoots @C; B hits A, B hits C; C shoots @A; B wins;

Nine of the ten matches were won by B. The one other match was won by A. This led to a facepalm realization I didn’t discuss yet. If A decidedly shoots C, C is incapable of winning. That said, whoever A and C shoot can’t win.

This required more randomization than I was willing to flip for, so I headed to the language I know best, (which isn’t saying much) PHP.

After some tweaking and experimenting I formulated the following code:

$i = 0; //loop counter
$j = 0; //everyone is dead counter
$a - 0; //A survives counter
$b = 0; //B survives counter
$c = 0; //C survices counter
$t = 0; //counter for two living at the end

while($i != 9000) {
	//assume one shot each, except B who gets two simultaneous shots.
	$i++;
	$Arand = rand(1,2); //1 is a hit, 2 is a miss
	$Brand1=rand(1,2); //1 is a hit, 2 is a miss
	$Brand2=rand(1,2); //1 is a hit, 2 is a miss
	$Crand = rand(1,2); //1 is a hit, 2 is a miss

	//set all players to alive
	$A = "alive";
	$B = "alive";
	$C = "alive";

	//find out who gets shot and dead them
	if($Arand==1){
		$B = "dead";
	} else {
		$C = "dead";
	}
	if($Crand==1){
		$A = "dead";
	} else {
		$B = "dead";
	}
	if($Brand1==1){
		$A = "dead";
	}
	if($Brand2==1){
		$C = "dead";
	}

	//is everyone dead? at least one person will die
	if($A==$B&&$B==$C){
		$j++;
	}

	//unlikely but possible that two people live (more likely than I first thought)
	if(($A=='alive'&&$B=='alive')||($A=='alive'&&$C=='alive')||($C=='alive'&&$B=='alive')){
		$t++;
	}

	//add up the living people
	//display their status in color
	if($A == 'alive'){
		$a++;
		echo "<font color='green'>".$A."</font> ";
	} else {
		echo "<font color='red'>".$A."</font> ";
	}
	if($B == 'alive'){
		$b++;
		echo "<font color='green'>".$B."</font> ";
	} else {
		echo "<font color='red'>".$B."</font> ";
	}
	if($C == 'alive'){
		$c++;
		echo "<font color='green'>".$C."</font> ";
	} else {
		echo "<font color='red'>".$C."</font> ";
	}

	//line break
	echo "<br />";

}
	//total the stats, who is it better to be?
	echo "All die in ".$j." battles, thats ".(($j/$i)*100)." percent.<br />";
	echo "Survival rates for <br />A: ".$a." battles or ".(($a/$i)*100)." percent <br />B: ".$b." battles or ".(($b/$i)*100)." percent <br />C: ".$c." battles or ".(($c/$i)*100)." percent <br />";
	echo "in ".$t." battle(s) two people lived. Or ".(($t/$i)*100)." percent.";

I ran the code a number of times with different loop values. Lower loop values led to a little more variation, but that was to be expected with a smaller sample size.

Finally I settled on 9000 games and gave it a run, here’s my result:

All die in 2828 battles, thats 31.422222222222 percent.
Survival rates for
A: 2243 battles or 24.922222222222 percent
B: 2248 battles or 24.977777777778 percent
C: 2243 battles or 24.922222222222 percent
in 562 battle(s) two people lived. Or 6.2444444444444 percent.

These numbers are fairly consistent across multiple runs of the script. They also surprised me.

According to these numbers everyone died in 31% of the games. That means in ~70% of the games there was a winner. In this 70%, each player survived about 24% of the time. My original thought was that one player might have a competitive advantage over a different player, but this seems to indicate the survival rates for all are the same.

Granted, this “study” lacks any personal bias or thought process when all the decisions are made randomly, but I wanted to know if there was any value in choosing one player over another. In a completely randomized world, there isn’t.

The Conclusion:
There are a lot more potential variations of this game that could be tried, but I feel that my testing worked well for my limited purposes. As I view the final results of my code, I can’t help but compare this type of game to a three way game of paper, scissors, rock.* It might be interesting to look at the scenario from that viewpoint more closely and compare two simulations, but I won’t be doing that.

Overall this was a fun little project to distract from the daily monotony from which the mind rebels.

*Yes, I know that some people have learned the game as “rock, paper, scissors” but as a Communication Specialist, I am forced to disagree, purely on a syllabic count. Paper and scissors both have two syllables, which means they take longer to say and are not as emphatic. Rock, on the other hand is a shorter word with one syllable and can produce a sharp punctuation of sound, which lends itself nicely to a climactic unveiling of weapon choice. You’re welcome to use whichever is more comfortable to you personally, but I can’t help but point out that there is an emotional and atmospheric reason for choosing the order of the words. Choose correctly!

In the event of an Apocalypse…

I’ve been watching a lot of depressing movies lately. Not necessarily on purpose, it just turned out that way. First I saw The Road (my rating: 1/5), then I saw Daybreakers (4.5/5), followed by Doomsday (3/5), and then Carriers (4/5) (reminded me of Zombie Land (4/5)), and finally Twilight: Eclipse (2/5).

So on my drive home from work today, I started thinking: “If I was the only person that was alive in the world, what would I do?”

The answer came to me rather quickly. I would drive.

I would drive like I was in a movie. I would take fast corners, spin donuts, teach myself those crazy hand break turns. When my car died, I would simply find another one. Maybe I would even find another one first. But I would drive.

Ultimately, this wouldn’t really matter much, because if I honestly was the last person alive things would get really boring really quickly, but still, I think that’s what I would do.

What would you do if you were the last one alive?

Blind as a bat

It has come to my attention that the phrase “blind as a bat” is not at all politically correct. Bats are not actually blind, they just don’t see the way we see. That is to say, they see things differently than we do. In todays society of tolerated opinions, saying someone is blind because they don’t see things the way you do is not only frowned upon, but grossly inappropriate.

Think about it.

Time Travel

Tova 1Many people have talked about the possibility of time travel and the implications it might have. No one, though, has come close to imagining the true potential of time travel. That is, until now.

The real potential of time travel is huge: food will never spoil. Now, I know what you are thinking. You think if you find some old turkey in your fridge then you can simply go back in time a few days and make a turkey sandwich. That is just stupid. For, you see, if I go back in time a few days, chances are I won’t be in the mood for a turkey sandwich at all. Rather than go back in time, it would be better if I bought some turkey from the future to keep in case I ever needed a turkey sandwich.

How would this work you ask?

Take milk for example, a fresh gallon of milk usually has an expiration date of about two weeks. Now, if you sent that milk two weeks into the past, it’s expiration date would be four weeks into the future. The milk would essentially be good for a month.

If we began producing food or milk 200 years in the future and ship it back to the current present, then we will have milk that will last for 200 years and two weeks.

What’s more, in the future, we may discover better or more efficient ways to produce things like milk. Perhaps the milking process can be made even more humane, provided I am allowed to use that word to describe a cow. Indeed I am hesitant to use such language when commenting on the animal kingdom. You see, cows are not human. They don’t know what it is like to be human and therefore, have no reason to be treated humanely.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t approve the mistreatment or neglect of animals, but I do feel that humanity should not take it’s humaneness lightly. We have worked hard at being humane and I would hate to have all this effort stolen by a bunch of bovine who do nothing but stand and eat all day.

On those same lines, if I was a cow, which I am most certainly not, I would not expect a free handout from humans wishing to treat me more like them. I don’t want a two story house or a bed or a boat. I don’t want a steak dinner and I don’t need the government to step in with a new healthcare plan. All I need is a patch of grass and a few hundred gallons of water, or perhaps a few wine coolers on a hot day.

Me, with words.

The verbosity, or wordage that consistently, or not, makes up that which I like to think of as ‘my mind’ may or may not be entirely coherent to either the sender or receiver of the message which is communicated, or, at very least, is attempted to be communicated, if I am allowed to use such a tense.

I do enjoy the aspect of communication, but I desire to play with words, which, much to my amusement, can completely obscure a simplistic phrase with a mask of incongruence.

For example, many of my thoughts and arguments are well thought out and organized. I don’t often say things without a purpose (unless I think that the situation calls for it.) Many times I present my statements with a subtle flourish that leaves my listener confused by my “randomness” and myself quite satisfied that I have said my peace and have easily overshot the comprehension of my audience.

Directness has it’s place. When I am giving instructions on how a task is to be done, step by step instructions are usually a necessity. Details are of utmost importance. But in “inconsequential” daily banter, the freedom of expression can be allowed the importance. My goal is not necessarily to confuse people, although I usually know what/how to say something in a manner that might.

If the common response was not the typical “Say what? — You’re really weird.” and instead was a moment of thought, connecting my statement with the flow of the conversation, perhaps a reflection or two on different allusions, there would be a chance for higher comprehension, a better understanding and maybe, just maybe, a bit of intellectual growth.

I connect everything to everything. A cliche or proverb may seem out of place, but with a small change in wording or understanding, it can make perfect sense.

In short, my thoughts make perfect sense in context, but I leave context to be filled in by the participants. (Note the conciseness that I can achieve, when desired.)

An incomplete example is stuck in my mind as I write this. I was having a conversation with someone and knowing how they would react, I was keeping my references slightly obscured, partly to make them think but mostly for my own enjoyment. We were talking about what was acceptable in a given situation. My point was that the acceptability needed to be judged externally. For example, in a professional situation an action’s acceptability would need to be judged by either a higher position (a boss or manager) or from the view of someone lesser (such as a customer or client.) An employee has to live along company guidelines. This, I felt, was too wordy, but could easily be summarized by the old adage: “beauty is in the eye of the beholder.” And that is what I said.

So what is the end cause? I don’t know yet. Achieving a better understanding of ones self is usually a step forward. I would say “admitting that you have a problem is the first step towards recovery,” but I don’t see this as a problem. I am more than capable of clarity when the situation calls for it, and I certainly don’t act like this all the time.

Perhaps this might be more of a sounding call. To see if anyone else thinks along these lines. Or maybe it’s just a general interest piece meant to inspire others to open their minds to knew ideas or means of communication. It might be a call for help, not in terms of stopping, but in terms of how to improve said technique and truly master this art of subtly.

Five personalities I want to see play Harry Potter

Johnny Bravo “Whoa momma! Wanna watch me comb my hair really fast?”
The Joker “You wanna know how I got this scar?”
River Tam “Nothing in the ‘verse can stop me.”
Billy Mays “I’M HARRY POTTER AND TODAY I WANT TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT…”
Sponge Bob “I’m ready, I’m ready, I’m ready, I’m ready, I’m ready…”